Trying to conceive and wondering where to begin? Maybe you’ve found yourself in the same position as some of the following women, as you’ve started thinking about or trying to get pregnant…
Mary is in her mid-twenties and engaged to be married. She already knows she has long and irregular cycles and wonders if she’ll have trouble getting pregnant. She figures they’ll take a wait-and-see approach, but wonders sometimes if she should be worried, and whether there’s more she could be doing naturally to increase her chances of getting pregnant.
Kara is married and in her late twenties. For years, she and her husband have tried unsuccessfully to have children. Feeling frustrated and disappointed but not wanting to go the IVF route, she figures her only other option is to just “leave it in God’s hands” and see what happens. She is vaguely aware she could investigate restorative reproductive medical protocols like NaProTechnology but isn’t ready to commit the time or energy yet to that kind of deep dive into what might be wrong. Plus, that would feel like an acknowledgement that “something is wrong,” which she’s not emotionally ready for either.
Katelyn is married and in her early thirties, working in a high-stress, fast-paced corporate environment. After four years of trying to conceive, she was told at her last doctor’s visit that IVF is her (only) next step. While cost isn’t a prohibiting factor, the time involved, the physical risks for her, and some of the ethical issues she’s heard about give her and her husband pause. She wishes she had more options.
What if conceiving weren’t as complicated as it feels? Fortunately, many women are able to conceive naturally once they understand how their own bodies work. And plenty of low-cost, low-tech lifestyle changes can help a woman become healthier and hopefully increase her chances of conceiving.
Let’s review how conception happens
In order to get pregnant, you need a few things. First, you need a mature egg, released during the once-a-cycle process of ovulation. You also need good quality cervical mucus, which helps sperm deposited in the vagina during sex not only survive but also travel up the vagina through the cervix to the rendezvous point in the Fallopian tube for fertilization.
The catch is that good quality cervical mucus—also called “egg white cervical mucus” (EWCM) because egg whites are a pretty apt description of what it looks like—is generally only produced during the woman’s fertile window, meaning the time of her cycle that she is able to conceive. A woman’s fertile window generally starts 3-5 days before ovulation, and lasts through 1 or 2 days after she ovulates. Again, ovulation refers to the process whereby one mature egg is released by one of the woman’s ovaries. That egg lasts just 12-24 hours if it is not fertilized by sperm.
Given these factors, a woman’s fertile window lasts up to roughly 7 days per menstrual cycle, if you start counting with the appearance of EWCM 3-5 days before ovulation and stop counting 48 hours afterwards (although depending on your unique cycle, it can last longer or shorter than that). Outside of your fertile window, pregnancy cannot occur. Contrary to what many people think, the number of days per cycle that a woman can conceive is actually very limited, especially if she has long or irregular cycles.
The good news, though, is that a couple can significantly increase their chances of conceiving if they target the woman’s fertile window for acts of sexual intercourse. Some doctors recommend that couples have sex every other day during the fertile window (versus every day) for maximum sperm health.
That’s getting pregnant at its most basic. All of the troubleshooting around infertility with fertility awareness methods (FAMs) of natural family planning (NFP) and Restorative Reproductive Medicine (RRM), as NaProTechnology does, essentially explores the reasons why one or more of those basic components needed for conception is missing or malfunctioning.
Five tips to increase your chances of conceiving
1. Eat a healthy diet and seek a balanced lifestyle
Thankfully, there are low-tech lifestyle changes you can make now to improve your overall health, and hopefully your chances of conceiving. You can decrease your consumption of alcohol, caffeine, and sugar, and stop smoking. Moderate aerobic exercise 3-4 times per week is a nearly universal recommendation for women trying to achieve pregnancy.
Eating a diet low in processed foods and full of dark, leafy greens and colorful fruits and veggies correlates with improved overall health. Beyond that general recommendation, some research suggests that what you eat can actually help balance your hormone levels and increase your chances of conceiving. If that interests you, look into seed cycling or these reputable supplements.
2. Make sure your medications aren’t negatively affecting your fertility
Additionally, you can check whether any of your regularly scheduled medications interfere with cervical mucus production, as happens with some antidepressants, epilepsy medicines, antihistamines, and allergy medications. Talk with your doctor about other options that can meet your needs while trying to conceive.
3. Seek treatment for hormonal issues
Keep in mind, too, that if you were previously taking a form of hormonal birth control, your body may take several cycles to reset and attain the proper hormone levels required to get (and stay) pregnant. Note, however, that if you went on the pill to “regulate” your cycle, you should anticipate that the semblance of “regulation” will stop with the pills, because birth control is only a band-aid for hormonal problems and not a cure. If your birth control was previously masking a hormonal problem and it returns, you may need to first seek treatment from a restorative reproductive medical provider to be able to get pregnant naturally.
4. Get tested for sexually transmitted infections (STIs)
Getting tested for STIs (and treated, if applicable) is straightforward, and an easy check-off on the “things to do to conceive” list, since some STIs directly impact your chances of conceiving.
5. Manage stress
Stress management is especially important for women trying to conceive naturally, specifically because a chronically physically or emotionally stressed person’s body will respond by pumping out the stress hormone cortisol. While the exact methodologies are not well understood, we do know that when the body is chronically in overdrive producing cortisol, eventually progesterone production and ovulation are negatively affected. Low progesterone numbers can impact both your ability to get pregnant and to stay pregnant. Managing your stress, then, through self-care, mindfulness, guided meditation, prayer, and counseling, can actually make a difference in your quest to conceive. There is also a great resource called Organic Conceptions, that can lead couples toward better emotional health on their journeys toward conception.
The single most important thing you can do to get pregnant is…
Exercising, eating well, and reducing your caffeine intake are all worthwhile lifestyle changes to make if you’re trying to conceive. The single most important thing you can do to increase your chances of getting pregnant, though, is to learn a fertility awareness method (FAM) from a trained instructor (the trained instructor part is key, not negligible).
Why should you learn a FAM even if you’re not sure you want to undergo extensive testing and diagnostic workups? The single most important reason to learn a FAM if you’re trying to conceive naturally is that you will learn how to identify your body’s own signs of fertility, especially the changes in consistency, color, and amount of cervical mucus that correlate with a cyclical shift from infertility (most of the cycle) to fertility (the fertile window). These days, there’s an effective, evidence-based FAM for virtually any lifestyle, including swing shift workers, those with variable sleep-wake cycles, and so on.
That’s not all you’ll gain by learning a FAM, though. Learning to chart your cycle by writing down on paper (or typing into an app) the personalized, observable data points like cervical mucus and temperature changes that your body offers you on a daily basis, is not just what you do when you’re worried that something’s wrong. Learning to chart your cycle is beneficial for every woman, regardless of whether you are currently trying to conceive or not, because reproductive health is an indicator of overall health in the body, leading some to even call it “the fifth vital sign.” You can monitor your heart health through your Apple iWatch, and you can monitor your reproductive health through your cycle charting.
Increasing your body literacy can lead you to extend grace to yourself when you’re facing a big work deadline just as “that time of the month” is approaching, to become more comfortable in your own skin, and to work with your body rather than against it.
If necessary, you can use that information to work with a trained healthcare professional to troubleshoot issues like PMS, abnormal bleeding, irregular cycles, and, yes, infertility, which is not a primary diagnosis itself, but is instead a symptom of something else being wrong. But you don’t need to wait until something is wrong to get in touch with your body by learning a FAM.
Learn more about how to improve your chances of conceiving
Ready for more details on conceiving and infertility? Wondering if it’s time to seek out professional medical help? Learn how you can find a FAM instructor or a Restorative Reproductive Medicine doctor either locally or via telehealth. You can also check out the “Unexplained Infertility” Summit’s compilation of presentations from dozens of reproductive health and Restorative Reproductive Medicine professionals. Wherever you are on your journey, you are not alone, and there many available to walk on this path with you.
Additional Reading:
4 Supplements to Naturally Boost Your Fertility When Trying to Conceive
When trying to conceive, save months by using fertility awareness
How FAM Can Help a Couple with Male Infertility to Conceive
What Every Woman Getting Off the Pill Needs to Know Before Trying to Have a Baby
