Prior to being diagnosed with PCOS, I experienced an interesting variety of responses from the medical community to the various symptoms of my disorder. I encountered everything from a standoff with an endocrinologist who insisted she could do nothing but put me on birth control, to a primary care physician who thought I was a hypochondriac. After each of these encounters, I found myself wondering with increasing frustration, “Why is it that my doctor won’t listen to me?”
I have since found out that, unfortunately, feeling that your doctor isn’t listening to you or taking you seriously is a surprisingly common experience for women with PCOS and other reproductive disorders or irregular periods. While situations vary, here are some suggestions for retaining your sanity when your doctor won’t listen to you.
Tip #1 for when your doctor won’t listen to you: Remain calm
Even when there is a difference of opinion, becoming heated helps absolutely no one. Stay calm. If this is hard to do, it may help to remember that doctors are usually trying to be helpful even if their approach to patient care is less than comforting.
#2 Stand your ground
There’s no need to feel intimidated by a doctor’s advice simply because he or she is a doctor. A medical degree is not a certificate of ultimate authority. Only you can feel your body’s symptoms.
#3 Take pain seriously
Many doctors see womanly pains as a routine part of life. However, pain can be an important indication that something is truly wrong. Especially because extreme pain can be a sign of debilitating reproductive health disorders, such as PCOS or endometriosis, it is important that medical professionals take the symptom of pain seriously.
#4 Seek second and third opinions
Not all doctors are alike. If consulting your doctor about an ongoing problem is starting to feel like a dead-end road, it may be time to move on. Sometimes a new doctor can find a problem that went undiagnosed by previous medical professionals. Additionally, a new doctor may be aware of other ways to treat a known condition. If you haven’t tried yet, this may be just the time to reach out for an opinion from a doctor trained in Restorative Reproductive Health such as NaProTechnology or FEMM.
#5 Research your options
Even if your doctor presents one solution as if it is the only option to address your medical problem, there may be other options as well. One method of treating a condition may be more successful than others, but any given condition usually has a host of ways to approach treatment. It never hurts to know what kind of options are out there in order to determine which one is the best fit for you.
#6 Don’t settle for less
The world of reproductive treatment is full of ways to “fix” problems, from masking hormonal imbalance symptoms with oral contraceptives, to neglecting to treat underlying causes of infertility when directing women toward in vitro fertilization (IVF). While contraceptives may make symptoms of disorders like endometriosis and PCOS more tolerable, they do nothing to treat these underlying conditions–plus, they come with a host of unsavory side effects. Similarly, while IVF may help a couple have a child, it does not get to the root cause of infertility, and also comes with its own side effects and heartbreaks.
The good news is, these are not the only solutions out there. Sometimes finding genuine solutions requires passing up false ones.
#7 Find support
Spend time with friends and family. When your doctor won’t listen or doesn’t seem to understand you, the people who know you best can be a huge source of support. Even reading stories about people you don’t know who are facing the same challenges can be a helpful reminder that you’re not alone.
#8 Don’t give up hope
If you feel your doctor isn’t listening, it can be very frustrating. Many women write to Natural Womanhood saying they have had similar experiences, such as being pressured to take birth control as the only solution for painful menstrual cramps and other symptoms. Don’t give up hope. There are people out there who can help. Even if it takes work to find them, it will be worth the effort.
Have you ever experienced the frustration of feeling like your doctor won’t listen to you, or will only offer you a “one-size-fits-all” approach to treatment like birth control? Check out the resources below for how to talk to your doctor about a truly restorative approach to your fertility:
Medical Benefits of Fertility Awareness: Why Doctors Need to Embrace the Science of Charting
