I’ve been charting my fertility for 5 years now. A lot has changed in those 5 years. I’ve changed methods, changed instructors, I’ve gotten married, moved across the country, had a baby, and started a career. My cycles have witnessed it all. What would I tell myself 5 years ago when I first stepped out on this expedition?
Dear Cassie,
Don’t be afraid to get a certified instructor. You’ll read a lot of books and blogs and articles, but don’t be a penny-pinching college student. Do it. Spend the money. It’s worth the peace of mind and confidence.
You’ll feel so much better without the hormones! You’ll actually understand everything that’s going on in your body and you will feel more empowered than any yaz ad could even try to boast about. It will take time and it won’t happen overnight but you’ll be so grateful to know your cycles like the back of your hand.
You’ll be fertile at really inconvenient times. Like vacation, and anniversaries and date nights that you organized a sitter for weeks and weeks ago. Run with it and it sounds crazy, but enjoy it. It really does make for a strong bond between you and your husband.
You’ll start with sympto-thermal. You’ll hate paper charting. You’ll use apps, a few different apps actually, until you settle on the one you like. This is much better than all that paperwork. After your pregnancy, you’ll change to the Marquette method. This time, you will shell out for an actual instructor. Good job, pat yourself on the back. (Shout out to Sarah Tramonte, an awesome Marquette teacher!) You’ll get sick of Marquette once your postpartum cycles come back, and switch to the FEMM model, but keep taking temps. But this time you’ll use the Wink thermometer and you’ll love it. Flexibility is your friend, so just embrace it!
Oh right, the pregnancy. You will get pregnant. (Re: You’ll be fertile at really inconvenient times.) But it will be amazing. Don’t be afraid. Your daughter will be the most amazing tiny human. You didn’t know love could feel that way.
You see, at first, charting your fertility will feel like just another form of birth control. But it’s not, it’s more than that. It’s a lifestyle – and one that will transform your life. The novelty will wear off but the influence it has on you and your relationship won’t. There will be seasons of charting and your family planning needs will change. Some days, fertility charting will make you feel like a rockstar and other days you might wish you could throw it all out the window. After a while, it won’t feel like a method at all, it will just be part of your life.
There will be advances in the fertility world. Like the Wink, and Daysy, and progesterone strips. And FABM will gain more awareness and acceptance. But still, not everyone will be as enthused as you and that’s okay.
You’ll be really happy you made the jump from the pill to fertility charting. It won’t be a seamless transition. (Can I emphasize this enough? Get. An. Instructor. They can make this transition so much easier.) And you’ll go places with it. You’ll even end up being an instructor yourself and it will bring you so much enjoyment to share your passion with other women.
So to myself (5 years ago), dive right in and don’t be afraid. In the meantime, stop forcing your feet into ungodly uncomfortable shoes just because they’re cute and cheap, and wear some sunscreen, for pete’s sake.
Hi Cassie! I’m a Marquette instructor and training now in FEMM! Your article is great! Curious, does Wink sync with the FEMM app or just with Kindara?
“share your passion with other women” – yes, fertility awareness is Passion of Life indeed.
Imagine all these birds, whales, fish, antelopes and even butterflies. They live and die, travel great distances and fight to transfer life to the next generations. Natural family planning, charting, just noticing your changes means being the part of this great spectacle, pulsing with the heartbeat of nature.